Confusifying Linguification: Spinach Filled Garlic Twists

There are three reasons for this blog, and there are three parts. Reason dictates that there should be one reason per posting, and here it is.

#1 Reason - Many people do not actually believe that I make the bread I claim to make.

Today's society does not allow for such 'traditional' ways of cooking/baking. It should either be defrosted from a box, or bought precooked. "Bread? Like with yeast?" Shocking I know, but it is true. Without even a bread maker to aid me, I have succeeded in being behind the times.

In a large bowl mix 2 cups of warm water, 2 1/4 teaspoons of yeast (it does not matter what kind. Yeast is yeast.) and a pinch of sugar. How much is a pinch? Look through your jar for any clumps caused by condensation. If you don't want the company to see it in the sugar bowl, toss it in here. If it is larger than your fist, common sense might tell you that this is more than a pinch.

In a second bowl mix 2 1/2 cups of warm water with half a cup oil (again, use whatever kind you want. It affects your bread though, so consider carefully. Would you really want olive oil in a sweet dough?), half a cup of sugar, and a pinch of salt. Whisk together as well as possible, and add to first bowl.

Begin adding flour. You are going to add up to 12 cups.

Add any flour 'alternatives' after the first three cups or so. Examples could include oats and flax seeds, as well as any spices or herbs that may be desired if you have a specific purpose for the dough. I usually only use 10 cups of flour after adding all of these extras.

Always remember that it is very simple to add a touch of extra flour if need be, but quite difficult to add more water.

It is time to plop your dough onto the counter when it is to hard to stir with a spoon anymore. It does not really matter how sticky the dough still is, as long as you have quite a thick layer of flour on the counter ready for kneading. This is another excellent time to add modifying ingredients to your recipe. I'll be using this dough for garlic twists, so I have added 2 minced cloves, about a tablespoon of garlic powder, and close to 3 tablespoons parsley.

Now it is time to knead. What a wonderful way to release stress, perhaps this is why I am such a pleasant person. Did that driver that cut you off this morning make you angry? Did a family member lie to you? Did a co-worker get the raise that you deserve? Make sure that you haven't beaten your dough to a pulp, and check to see if you need to add more flour. You will know the dough is finished by the way it feels. It should have become more 'elastic-like' in the way it holds shape, it will no longer blob all over the counter. I have been told that the dough should feel like your earlobe, but I have another body part you could refer to. Get your mind out of the gutter. Your cheek. Open your mouth very wide into an 'o' shape and poke the hollow of your cheek. This is how your dough should feel if you poke it, soft but elastic.

Place your dough in a lightly oiled bowl, and cover until risen. For those who simply do not have the time to wait, pop it into the oven with the door open. Once your oven has reached the lowest temperature setting, turn the oven off. You want to warm the dough, not bake it.

The dough is ready for use when more than doubled in size.

(Many thanks to the Decadent Housewife for the basic recipe which I have altered to suit my own needs. Also, I take no responsibility for the sun shining in the middle of my photos. I may have a lot of time on my hands, but not so much that I will move everything that I am doing to ensure the perfect photograph.)